Am I Becoming A Grumpy Old Man?

In Star Wars Episode 8 ("The Last Jedi"), many fans were dismayed by the portrayal of Luke Skywalker as a disillusioned old hermit who wants nothing to do with the Jedi. Despite the fact that the movie (along with the entire dreadful "sequel trilogy") has an utterly illogical plot, unoriginal ideas and forgettable characters dressed up in glitzy big budget filmmaking, I've always defended the decision to portray Luke this way.

I can see how he who vanquished the evil empire (with a little help from his friends) would be overwhelmed with the weight of the responsibility of single-handedly resuscitating the Jedi Order. And when things didn't go as planned, it's easy to see how cynicism could creep in and steal his youthful idealism.

This may be a silly example, but in the past few years I've come to see how Luke could become a grumpy old man. And despite unspoken vows to never be one, I've noticed myself slipping down the slope of Grumpy Old Man Valley.

It's not like I have a good excuse. I've had my hard times in life just like everyone else, but overall I've had an easy life. I'm extravagantly blessed in every area of existence. I have no right to complain. What's more, in recent years my life has been more carefree than it has been in decades. My kids are pretty much grown up. I have the closest thing to a dream job I've ever had, etc.

And yet, I'm noticeably more grumpy than ever. Aren't you supposed to become more patient with age? I seem to be less patient. I've become far more cynical of both people and institutions. Instead of thinking the best of others, I often tend to assume the worst. My sentiment is often along the lines of, “Yeah right.”

Why is this?

There are the typical reasons: I do feel like I've heard it all before. There's nothing new under the sun. Each generation thinks it’s different. “You don’t understand us–we aren’t like those pathetic geezers who came before us,” said every generation ever. 

As a teacher, I deal with what is politely called “academic integrity” issues constantly. I can usually spot it a mile away, and that includes using artificial intelligence to write that essay. The protocol that I’m to follow says to assume the student didn’t realize what they’re doing is wrong, and to work with them to avoid that in the future. But what I’d rather do is slap it with a zero, as a thought like “Quit cheating, you little punk!” flutters through my mind.

Additionally, I feel like I’ve spent so much of my life waiting for others that I just don’t want to do it anymore. I know what I want and what I don’t, so stay out of my way! And I’ve found what works and what doesn’t, so therefore I tend to be “Stuck in my ways.”

All this grumpiness is what the Bible would call “works of the flesh,” and I’ve seen where those lead. Though the Grumpy Old Man part of me may not want to “take up my cross,” show mercy “cheerfully,” and “walk in the Spirit,” I know THAT’S the way to go. What’s the result? Some of the “fruits of the Spirit” are love, joy, peace, PATIENCE, and kindness. I don’t have to be a grumpy old man–I have a choice. Here’s hoping I choose wisely!